And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)
A few weeks ago, two missionaries to an isolated African tribe spoke at church. Some of the things they experienced were pretty intense- snakes, fires, and even lions! I was amazed at what God had called them to do and their journey. They talked about a lot of miracles they’ve experienced and how it deepened their relationship with Christ.
I’ve spent time since then thinking about what God’s purpose could be for me. Am I supposed to give my all for the church as a missionary in Central America or Africa? Am I supposed to sing in the church choir? Play my ukulele in the band? Serve on the altar guild? Volunteer at a hospice center? Become a pastor?
As I’ve pondered what God wants me to do with my life, I’ve thought about Jonah – he heard God but refused to do what was being asked of him.
The word of the Lord came to Jonah son of Amittai: “Go to the great city of Nineveh and preach against it, because its wickedness has come up before me.” But Jonah ran away from the Lord and headed for Tarshish. (Jonah 1:1-3a)
“Jonah ran away from the Lord” really resonates with me. After all, didn’t I do that all those years ago? I ran from God. I won’t say I was given a mission from God that I refused to do, in fact it was the opposite – I felt like God had abandoned me, I couldn’t hear him any longer. So I left the church, searching for I don’t know what, until God led me to my friend, who then helped me find God again. But 25+ years later, I am still wondering what God is calling me to do.
I’ve read a few blog posts that have helped. One I enjoyed discussed how you can know you’re not hearing God and then six steps you can take to reconnect and hear what he’s calling you to do. They are:
- Go to God in prayer,
- Dig into God’s words,
- Determine your gifts and strengths,
- Determine your passions,
- Bring others into your life (asking others for advice).
- Take a solitude retreat.
I’ve spent time this doing a few of those things (not all – I would love to go on a solitude retreat but that’s not in the cards right now).
What’s God calling me to do?
He hasn’t told me yet, but I know even wondering about it means he’s drawing me closer so I’m ready when he finally does tell me. My mission for now is to be silent, read my bible, pray more, and wait to hear what he wants me to do.
Lord, thank you for helping me focus more on listening to you. Thank you for leading me down a path that helps me trust you. Thank you for drawing me closer to you. Thank you for helping me understand that just by asking what You want from me I’ve become more open to hearing that calling. Thank you for your infinite patience, love, and grace. Amen.